ha-dee-dums

it's my off day it's my off day it's my off day it's my off day it's my off day!
again, it's shopping day! (:

am currently in a back-to-school craze.
well, the most crazed part is over (what with the $96 expenditure at Paperchase last week! and to my utmost horrors we missed out the waterbottle the other day! i asked monk to decide between 2 designs, and so he did. den i asked him to pick one for me that's the most unscathed out of the lot, while i check out the stationeries and tada. end of story. we totally forgot about the bottle in the end. probably because i got too excited in the midst of him choosing and dragged him everywhere, he forgot too. oh wells.)
pencil case (checked)
stationeries (checked)
so what i need now is a bag (or bags) and my waterbottle from Paperchase! (:
AND, my PC notebook.
I am rooting for Vaio C no matter what. (in the picture, it's the one surrounded by all the other Vaio Cs. the white one. it's $1999, comes with free ram upgrade from 512mb to 1gb and a free slip case and a free ms office 2007! valid till 31 march only. going to Sim Lim tmr. i am rooting for it no matter what. hiak. i think my mummy will relent and not listen to my awful brother who wants to get me the lousiest dell available. ok. i lied. not exactly the lousiest la. but compared to my sony vaio, what is not lousy, you tell me? minus macbook!) it's not as if i'm getting the colourful Vaio C what, which costs $2299. (just for some stupid graphic card that's of no importance to me cuz i dont play games.) ya lor. and i know i'll be happy with my Vaio C, even though it's black or white only.
i'll be super unhappy with a bloody ugly dell. with no fascinating third party softwares inside, unlike my lovely Vaio C! (((((:


am supposed to be packing my room tonight.
look at it's current plight:my brand new dressing table that hasn't been seen before yet by all of you (:
and it's in a terrible mess cuz it was installed a few days before CNY and i havent had time to pack yet since i'm at work every miserable day >.< dont even have space for tissue box. haha.
my bloody messy wardrobe. or rather, HALF of my bloody messy wardrobe.my uber messy study table. with rubbish everywhere. it surprisingly looks neat. haha. my Paperchase purchases (say 10 times! Paperchase purchases Paperchase purchases Paperchase purchases...) still lying on the floor! (bottom right plastic bag)
oh yarh. forgot to shoot the tv to show you all! smack in the middle facing my bed.
nya-ha-ha-ha!

yeah. today is actually more of window shopping. nv really bought much, because i want to show all of it to monk on sunday!
ha-dee-dums! (what i learnt from shopaholic series.)

Saturday's my official LAST DAY OF FULL TIME!
and yesterday, Jennifer came down for a surprise shop visit, and tried to persuade me to stay longer (since sch starts 16th april) and i was trying to tell her i need a break. and then and then! she somehow persuaded me to start working part time immediately. rah. so i think i'd be going back 3/4/5 april?
roar.
stupid me.

Check this Out!
who says JC are good? who says I-Space in NY rocks? who says the "Igloo" in VJC rocks their socks?
nya-ha-ha. wait till you check what SP offers.


ciao!

irrelevant but logical, no?

i'm timing myself till 10, but obviously, due to the superb quality of my camera, the pictures are always so huge (1mb at least) and it takes forever to upload.
yeap. some updates of the long awaited pictures, but due to time constraints i'm only putting some up!
Dinner at Indulgz Bistro (click here ) with monk to celebrate my birthday on 10th march...
we had the crispy pasta & the fish steak thingy.. crispy pasta was nice, but i still prefer soft pasta anyhow, so i let the crispy pasta turn soggy, which makes no difference with normal pasta. HA! the sauce was yummy-licious!
the fish steak thingy was a tad too bland & normal, but i'd recommend everyone to try their mashed potato!! really nice smooth & delicious!

this is my chocolate brownie birthday cake w vanilla ice cream! i would say Indulgz Bistro's food is on a average, not too bad rating for my taste buds. would patronise once in a while but definitely not frequently? but the ambience is really good there for small couple talks and the waiteress very nice & helpful! (:

met up with Nigus on 13th March at Fish & Co. this is a picture of Jia Jia's Ai Xin Bday Cake for me! (: looks promising huh?oooh! o_Ome & chloe monkey!
i heart nigus absolutely! although they make me mad and upset all e time. (the presents always look so last minute and feels unsincere, the arrangements is always so last minute and there's bound to me someone or even more that cannot turn up.. and i always feel so inadequate and unimportant, especially my bday period :( but somehow, the meet-up is always worth it and makes all these troubles fly away~ )

okay. basically that's all.
and just 2 days ago marks our nineth month. ((((((((((:
went on a shopping spree & we splurged!
caught Mr. Bean's holiday & it's really hilarious everyone should watch it for some laughs. honestly! pple nowadays are so stressed (be it working or studying or both!), we need more heroes like Mr. Bean to make everyone happy & relief stress!
seriously Rowan Atkinson (that's Mr. Bean, in case you all dont know) should really get some sort of prize or award or sth for being so ridiculously natural at acting Mr. Bean! it's as though he's not acting and we're watching a live transmission of him!

anyway, after movie, splurged at Border's Paperchase seriously made my day! it was really splurging! (how can anyone spend $96 on stationeries?!) and everything's so lovely i wanna buy all! yadda yadda!
ha di da.
then it was wisma's topman. note. TOPMAN. not TOPSHOP! seriously, when was e last time we went out and i never looked into Topshop?! and for the entire day i never bought anything but paperchase stationery, and the mini bean bag gadget holder for charging etc and xiuyi's present. while i got monk a new wallet! (: all white, from Topshop and also a bermudas, and he bought some funky briefs haha.

and den it was Parkway for steamboat. yum. only thing is, it's not that yummy after all. although everytime at work, i get a waft of the tantalizing smell and my stomach goes protesting "Hey! Why aren't you feeding me that?!"

oh yarh. bought my Eau De Toilette from Isetan Scotts. Chanel's Egoiste. which cost literally a BOMB. and i think i should really write to Isetan that the individual brands should have their own carriers! i mean, what's the point of buying something real posh and expensive but wrapped in an Istean paper bag?! on the inside, i know it's Chanel's Egoiste Eau De Toilette. but, on the outside, all everyone can see is some old crappy Isetan paper bag which probably consists of a $3 baby wipe. (haha. this is the only cheap thing i can think of cuz i work in the children's dept). i was really sulking and unhappy about it.
what's the point of spending $113 for my bloody perfume la. it felt so not worth it. it would feel so much better if i was given a nice, black, sleek & brand new chanel carrier. i was even contemplating asking for one from the Chanel boutique at Taka. only the expensiveness in the air made me back away. (mind you, there was this really classy umbrella. pure white with a black rose. and it costs $1020!)
ok, anyway i think i sound all superficial and materialistic, but i think u all should agree with what i say, no?
if not we can all go shopping and they can all use the Kiam Cai plastic bags vendors use in markets what. why bother to print their own carrier bags? if u go to a shop, (anyshop. doesn't have to be chanel.. say, bossini?) den they give you those market type cheapo plastic bags, what would you feel lor? that's how i felt lo. some cheapo isetan paperbags that cant even be reused for long periods. like Zara's carrier!

ok. this is totally irrelevant. and anyway, i NEED TO GO ALREADY OH MY GOSH IT'S 1044!!!

P.S. my "new year" resolution coming right up. (i need to blog this else i'd keep procrastinating. and wishlist probably? anyway, just some sort of lists coming up soon!
tata!
P.P.S. i'm so totally psyched about french now. haa-dee-dums.
au revoir! (in case u all dont know, it's "aw-re-vwa", means sth like bye.

because of... you.

I will not make the same mistakes that you did
I will not let myself cause my heart so much misery
I will not break the way you did
You fell so hard
I've learned the hard way, to never let it get that far

Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side
So I don't get hurt
Because of you 
I find it hard to trust 
Not only me, but everyone around me
Because of you
I am afraid

I lose my way
And it's not too long before you point it out
I cannot cry
Because I know that's weakness in your eyes
I'm forced to fake, a smile, a laugh
Every day of my life
My heart can't possibly break
When it wasn't even whole to start with

Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side
So I don't get hurt
Because of you
I find it hard to trust
Not only me, but everyone around me
Because of you
I am afraid

I watched you die
I heard you cry
Every night in your sleep
I was so young
You should have known better than to lean on me
You never thought of anyone else
You just saw your pain
And now I cry
In the middle of the night
For the same damn thing

Because of you
I never stray too far from the sidewalk
Because of you
I learned to play on the safe side
So I don't get hurt
Because of you
I tried my hardest just to forget everything
Because of you
I don't know how to let anyone else in
Because of you
I'm ashamed of my life because it's empty
Because of you
I am afraid

Because of you
Because of you



this song really hit me right in the face after my talk with tiffany.
sighs.
life sucks.
working life is really not a bed of roses (although i NEVER said it was),
but then it's getting suckier each day now.
what with all the backstabbing and badmouthing and a double-faced bitch and all
of us being all hypocritical & PR-ish.
ARGH. i cant wait for the 9 days to pass.
today's 20th. officially there's 11 more days till my last day.
but then, there's still 2 off days... (:
yeap. i've just printed "THE LETTER" out. tendering it tomorrow!
goodbye hypocrites & double-faced people.
although that's the minority, but i've had enough of it.
some ways it's been more enjoyable than NYJC, but in some ways,
it's so much far more complicated and political and whatsoever.
it's weird how everything that started so happily all ended up so differently,
unhappily & ugly.

i'm really looking forward to poly life. hope it rocks mann.

i'm missing bernard like hell.
i dont know why, but i think after spending such a wonderful time at work with him yesterday, i cannot survive working without him. LOL.
LOU DAO! HOU GUA JU LEI AH!
("daddy" i miss you!)
YK is giving us a helluva time here. and somehow without bernard & tiffany, everything seemed so much more unbearable. (like, 10 000x)
alrightey! no more thursday blues! look forward to tomorrow! (:
NO MORE ALBERT! (ns#1) and there's tiffany AND bernard! (:

--> i kinda landed albert into this. but shant elaborate further. it was HE who toed the line. no more buts! at least he's only TRANSFERRED to some other outlets, not like he's been FIRED. damn. i cant believe he got into RP! goddamnit. pple like him is enrolled there, then pple like tiffany who has a million x billion x trillion x zillion more brain cells than him should be enrolled somewhere else! (like SP! haha) i'm kinda feeling sad no one i know is going SP ):

it's all TP TP TP TP TP!
(what the hell is so great about TP?! lol. okay. it's great. it would be my first choice too if it weren't for the Diploma Plus SP is offering.)

ANYWAY! i got into SP people! yeap. Diploma in Business Administration.
my target would be a min GPA of 3.0 (better if can get 3.5! i shall aim high (: )
so i can get into my Dip. Plus -- Applied Business Psychology.
and i shall also aim well for my Foreign Language Course -- French! (2nd choice korean, cuz i think french sounds sexier. lol. but i just mailed the application form today.. so i dont know if i'm in. shall all wait for news! *wish me luck!* )

these few days have been so super busy, what with the season change, hence lack of sleep, and all the OTs...
enormously fatigue.
so, to cut things short...
Thank You nigus for the weird bangle, the coolios necklace, the unique tweed overalls, the gorgeous bottle of rose thingy and the gingerbread man! (:
and thank you my lovely <3 style="font-weight: bold;">ALL THE THINGS YOU'VE DONE AND PLANNED AND BOUGHT! (:
(and i bet there's more to come! haha)
and bernard my dear "daddy" for the... not so complimenting gift. haha. (HE SAYS I RESEMBLE THE THING HE BOUGHT! which is hideous, aside from the fact that it's all grinny & smily. rahrahrah. everyone loves bullying me. even shah says it resembles me when he didn't even know bernard bought it for me and that bernard also reckons it resembles me.)
ROAR.


pictures will be up soon! and renovation of my blog!
te revoir!

Happy Birthday To Me

Happy Birthday To Me
Happy Birthday To Me
Happy Birthday To Carmen
Happy Birthday To Me
saen gil chu ka hae yo (:but i feel like i'm an unhappy princess.
although my brothers loves me, they detest each other. (i dont know if they really really do detests each other, but still, they're at war.)
-brokenhearted-

i had no plans today.
it's one of those, i-thought-i-would-have-plans-so-i-didn't-make-any-plans-and-i-end-up-with-no-plans day.
and so i made my own plans!
it's a c.a.r.m.e.n day -- whereby i do things alone and enjoy the serenity and all my thoughts to myself.
but i started tearing when my jeans doesnt fit me to a T, and when i started thinking about my brothers, and when i started thinking i had no plans for today.
god, i'm so emotional these days. but i cant help it, it's just not the 18 Bash that i was hoping for.
i was in such a frustrated and maddening mood.
a sad girl who's angry at everyone.
i think i scared my mum, but oh wells. everyone has their moments!

and i set off and took a cab to Singapore Safety Driving Centre (:
and registered for Basic Theory Test.
GOD. they're FULLY BOOKED till MAY!
so i'm scheduled on 14th May, erm, 645pm i think. it's so far-fetched, i cant even remember!
yay. after Basic Theory, will be Final Theory, and then Practical Lessons, and the Practical Test and Voila!

after registeration, took the train to DBG and i rotted at the MRT station reading Shopaholic & Sister as i had no idea what to do and where to go because i have so much on my mind.
#1 watch a movie alone
#2 donate blood!
#3 buy my "hand" from Great World City, Molecule.
#4 probably go shopping and complete the birthday list for Xiu Yi...
bah. so much to accomplish, i dont know where to start.
so i decided to do #1, which is easy peasy! but ha! it wasn't that easy! when i reached Cathay, (i was opting for either a. Music & Lyrics or b. The History Boys or c. The Lives of Others) but dang! it was only 110pm, and all those that i opted for are starting at around 3pm. so i decided to wander around the entire Cathay and really have a good look at ANYTHING and EVERYTHING there. shop by shop. which is not too long cuz there aren't many shops there! so... i asked doris out. bah.
thank god she made it here in time haha.
and we watched Music & Lyrics together. and den...umm... basically it's just us chit chatting and walking (from cathay to gwc to wheelock to home)

and i had a nice dinner at home with my mum and dad (who needs brothers anyway? ok. i admit i said this only in spite but, ROAR! i only need daddy and mummy. that's all. nice little dinner for 3 of us just like everyday.)
and the sweet little Happy Birthday Song from the old silly bickering twosomes can make my world right side up again ((:
and all my sadness melt away...
with emotions swelling in me. (minus the DAMNED untimely phone call from my aunt.)
thank you daddy & mummy. i love you both muackx.

Thank Yous:
Shah - the First Bday present of 2007 (but it was on 8th Mar)
Daddy - First Present on 9 March (ang pao. hahaha!)
Monk - First sms
Elder Brother - Second sms (which was rather surprising cuz when i reminded him there's 5 more days to a special day the other time, he replied "who cares?" how bloody irritating yet annoyingly sweet is that.)
Clairey aka "duh-he's-cute" - Third sms! and the loveliest blog entry. i heart claire no matter how many hearts she has! haha.
Shobby - darling! i dont know who has curlier hair!
Xiu Yi, my love - the sweetest sms ever and all the love (:
Doris - the sms, the accompaniment, the listening ear, the care and concern
ying tong - you remember! okay, i wont forget yours is... is it 9 days? or 7 days later? hmm...
Jia Xin 708 - i wruv u choo worx!
Chloe - sarang hae yo! komawayo (:
Zanah - bf from isetan! (:
Hui Xiang - 滚! hiak hiak. thank you ah di!
Clarissa - dont worry i'll protect you forever, i promise >.< (and P.S. i'm NOT old lor! wah lao. 18 is not OLD. is the beginning of F-U-N!) Veron - oh dear! one of the shocking ones. cant believe you remember. -sobs-
Anandhi - Happy 18th Birthday too sweets
Ruthy - nicest dhsco junior (:
Tiffany - my dearest girl from bossini <3 style="font-weight: bold; color: rgb(0, 204, 204);">Jia Yin - Happy 20th Birthday too
Eldest Brother - for the loveliest Happy Bday Song you sung
Tiara - my darling, i miss you loads!
Natty - miss you lorryloads!
Cephia - thanks for remembering
Grace - surprise surprise!
Nita - yes woman, i miss you!
Chun Lok - uhh... thanks.
Bernard - Lou Dao! i heart papa bernard although he has child abuse tendencies...
Sun Yu - thanks fish!
(and Luo Jun & Bibi Jie)
and the list just goes on and on, as when i finished, more added in...
Thank You loads to everyone for filling my 18th Birthday with so much Love and Care and Concern! (:
everything started to brighten up! (ALOT ALOT!)

One Day...

i'm gonna munch on some lovely RAINBOW MnM's...
Lick an extremely sweet RAINBOW lollipop.
Put on my RAINBOW wristband and paint/draw a RAINBOW of my own.and hang my RAINBOW painting up!RAINBOWs are not meant for paper only! i'll paint RAINBOW on my hair and my eyes... and i'll look like her someday! even on my lips! and taste the RAINBOW ...

i'll dry my RAINBOW clothes on RAINBOW pegs!put on my RAINBOW scarves...and RAINBOW socks and play amongst a colourful array of RAINBOW balloons!

put on a RAINBOW guitar...

plays a RAINBOW song (somewhere, over the RAINBOW~)

drive my RAINBOW car (when i get my license of course! haha. preferably an SLK or a Vintage Car, or some really cute mini car!)

and watch a RAINBOW on the road...



okay, it's just... my imagination!
my creative juice!
i mean, people can have dreams what! =P

happy on the outiside

broken on the inside.


no one knows the pain i feel in my heart.
why cant both of you treat each other like how you both treat me?
i'm so torn and broken inside.
since i was at a sensible age, i've always been grateful to any almighty beings up there, lazing around in the clouds, watching over me, and bestowing such wonderful brothers to me.
doting on me like i was the one and only princess in their heart despite the VERY ONE AND ONLY OBVIOUS FACT that we're only half-siblings.(although my elder brother was rather strict and stern and irritating and demanding and i hated him severely during 10-12)
i mean, some real siblings (THEY THEMSELVES, yes the BOTH OF THEM! the irony to it!) cant even meet eye to eye to anything on under the sun. anything at all!
yet, we're not killing each other and vying for the love of our mother (our only blood relation), which is hell surprising, judging from the fact that they're at daggers with each other.

the great thing is, my birthday is tomorrow.
and none of them wants to even eat at the same table with the other.
how great is that.
i only knew about their fight yesterday. and while my mum was filling me in about everything, i was holding back the tears welling in my eyes. i know she's got enough on her plate already, what with both of my childish brothers wanting to dis-acknowledge each other over some stupid matters, so i didn't want to worry her.
while i was preparing for work, tears trickled down my face and the kind of pain that i feel inside could never be described.
but at work, (both yesterday & today) i was distracted from it and was my usual happy cheerful fun loving carmen. but like today, while i was on the bus after work, it just appeared in my mind again like a lightning across the sky.
and although i'm so happy giving bernard his birthday present and receiving one from shah (my beloved warrior), it feels as though this happiness was only on the surface. like a little toddler who cannot find his mother, receives a sweet -- happy.
pure happiness and they get engrossed and distracted by the sweet. but the effect doesn't lasts long... it starts to wear off...
when they realise their mummy is not around, the effect of the sweet wears off, and the emotions starts sinking in again... and they take seconds to start reacting, and then seconds again to start crying...
to start feeling the pain in me.

now we cant even have a simple dinner like how we used to in the past. just a dinner.
i dont even need presents from both of you.
i just want you both to patch up.
dont you understand?it's a damn fugly picture but who cares.
i need both of you, by my side.

okay...
havent updated in awhile now. have been crazily busy with work/obsessed in the shopaholic series. (currently reading my 3rd one. & i just bought the latest "Shopaholic & Baby"!!! cant wait to read it.)

1st March
took half day leave to attend my brother's shop's opening.
rah. i cant mention the shop name, lest he randomly googles for it and finds my blog and i have too many secrets here that cannot be revealed to him. (for e.g. Monk. and i cant think of any other examples besides MONK. lol.) yup.
so anyone who's not blind can tell what's the shop's name. please do patronise it! (: it's at AMK Hub and gosh, it's rather big for a neighbourhood shopping centre!


(heh. the flowers on the right were sent by me, my parents & my eldest brother! yup. this shop's my elder brother's. there's a diff between "st" and "r" okay. not the same brother!)


3rd Marchspent some quality time with monk. and this uber cute cat (please note down this moment, because i actually said cats are cute. i HATE cats. okay. that's extreme. i DISLIKE cats. and when i say cats, i mean domestic cats, not cartoon cats or blah. u get what i mean.) was sleeping!
and look at the way it's sleeping!


snoring...zzZ.

caught Dreamgirls with monk. god. Beyonce is SO BEAUTIFUL. and Jennifer Hudson can sing! ohmygod. she gave me goosebumps so many times, i'm absolutely sure it wasn't because of the freezing aircon. but, i think her voice is a tad too strong sometimes, it almost sounded BLARING. yup. it's not a bad movie, i guess?

DHSCO CONCERT AT VICTORIA CONCERT HALL:
Chui Da's Jiang Jun Ling.

backstage photos with people!

i was rather flabberghasted and at lost at what to do, when i entered the backstage, because this, i wouldn't say rude but blunt and a little impolite DYB girl said, "Sorry, you're not supposed to come here." with eyes of accusations that i'm some stupid stranger, and i, at that moment, felt like crying "I'M A SENIOR/ALUMNI!" for heaven's sake, and roll my eyes at her and walk straight in.
but nada. i was stumped.
it felt hurtful. probably because at dhsco, the alumnis seem so POWERFUL, and able to do almost ANYTHING and EVERYTHING. but at that moment, i felt so small and powerless, and as though i had nothing to do with dhsco at all.
nothing. i'm a stranger.
okay, the thought of it makes me feel sad enough.
happy thoughts. happy thoughts. happy thoughts!

photo taken with doris! (:photo taken with rachel (and gan jia as cupcup, the unfriendly ghost #1)cupcup, the unfriendly ghost #2. (HA! so what if i've got that big pimple on my cheek?! YOU'RE the one who has a distorted face! -smirks like the me in picture- )lovely. (:my handsome old man. (he looks so stern!)my handsome old man conducting (: he still remembers who i am! -swoons- when i was taking the picture, all i was thinking was that his arms are so beautiful. in other's eyes, he may be probably only flailing his arms, but, it's funny, at that moment, i imagined his (not very) pure white coat as the white music score, and when he's "flailing" his arms, music notes are dancing on it. (some sort of like those typical disney cartoon thingy)
haha. imagination run wild.

hmm. the night ended with me, rachel, doris & joel walking to MS for supper and then me reading my SS (shopaholic series for short) till 1am. that explains why i'm had a bloody headache and neckache today. (the aftereffects always happens 2 days later to me.)

anyway, i'm no longer "TRAINEE"!
Just started using my brand new "Sales Assistant" badge yesterday (:


Monday today. it's HORRID. weekdays are always HORRENDOUS for sales. I was at Isetan since 930am till 2pm and i only had 2 customers! I was so bored i went to play with the free gift from my kids' counter. I heard from Xue Mei (one of the part timers that has been working for 6months already) that this "tattoo free gift" has been circulating for at least 2 years. -speechless- no wonder we can never win Giordano. people are giving $10 Giordano gift voucher for every $60 spent, for heaven's sake.

anyway, we have at least a thousand, so i might as well go round and spread the joy! thus, all promoters that i know has it! ha.
"i die with you, you die with me" -carmen & joreen (:eBase top. it's too damn dark! but we really like it.... except...
we were trying to tell you it's TRANSLUCENT at the back. yarh. it IS. it's just that it's too dark in the fitting room. that's why we reserved it and we are STILL considering it. (we only have until tomorrow!)
god. i have to STOP spending like rebecca bloomwood.


Yati made me so tempted to buy the bossini kids wear larh. (picture beneath)
thank goodness i'm the in-charge. ha! i can reserve as long as i like and take as long as i like to consider! (until season change which is in less than 2wks, that is.)i didn't have time. so just took a random shot. how? do i look kiddish??? i really like the skirt, but it's actually up till my knee.. (i folded it up in the picture) but the top... i'm not exactly sure? (YES I KNOW I CAN FIT INTO KID'S SIZE, QUIT LAUGHING! YOU SHOULD BE JEALOUS BECAUSE I CAN BUY KID'S WEAR AND ADULTS WEAR!)

P.S. tmr i full shift leh! wah lao. den it's "Isetan Staff Day" and whole Singapore's Isetan is C.L.O.S.E.D! such shiokness! and tonight's their Dinner & Dance! although the dress code is casual beach wear, but still! they're having fun lor! unlike bossini, who'd DIE even if they close for a day. and our retail event had to be held in 2days, and we had to go in 2 groups even though we're from the same outlet. -grimace- no Isetan! full day in the store! the thought is unbearable. there'd be totally nothing to do. ):

just so you know

I shouldn't love you but I want to
I just can't turn away
I shouldn't see you but I can't move
I can't look away

I shouldn't love you but I want to
I just can't turn away
I shouldn't see you but I can't move
I can't look away

And I don't know how to be fine when I'm not
'Cause I don't know how to make a feeling stop

Just so you know
This feeling's taking control of me
And I can't help it
I won't sit around, I can't let him win now
Thought you should know
I've tried my best to let go of you
But I don't want to
I just gotta say it all
Before I go
Just so you know

It's getting hard to be around you
There's so much I can't say
Do you want me to hide the feelings
And look the other way

And I don't know
how to be fine when I'm not
'Cause I don't know how to make a feeling stop


This emptiness is killing me
And I'm wondering why I've waited so long
Looking back I realize
It was always there just never spoken
I'm waiting here...been waiting here