blue sequins

thank God it's friday
thank God it's last-day-of-school
thank God it's Claire-&-Clarissa day

the girlies never ever fail to plant this happy smile on my face (:

met up with them at Bugis and after calling Natty, we headed for Bali lane for this Masquerade shop to search for costumes for Natty's party tmr (:
when we stepped out of BHG, claire noticed some lingering dark grey clouds that spells "i'm-going-to-rain-on-you-three-poots-soon-hee-hee-hee"
we hurried back into BHG to get an ($3.90) umbrella.
and true enough, when we reached Raffles Hospital, it started POURING
when crossing the road to Bali Lane, Claire was loudly proclaiming her love for Natty, "OMG I hate Nat! i hate Nat! i hate Nat!"
and sad to say, i was secretly chanting after claire.
my entire right half was wet. clarissa's entire left half was wet. and claire's entire back was wet.
i think we looked like three pathetic and spasticated idiots squeezing under ONE translucent RED umbrella, squealing and screaming, trying to run yet trying to walk all at the same time.

when we reached the place, we were so OVERWHELMED (not to forget, SOAKED head to toe) by the tremendous range of costumes they have. it was SCARY. and we just stood there, not knowing where to start.
after HOURS of scouring through the place for a suitable "musical-themed" costume, each of us finally found SOMETHING to wear and left the place at 5plus.
i will not divulge here the characters that we're posing YET as NATALIE LING MUN WAI might be reading my blog now, WHO KNOWS! but yeah, it's damn exciting.
i will NEVER forget the looks on Claire Neo and Clarissa Khoo's faces when they saw my costume.
it's so scary i do not dare to look into my own reflection at all.
quote Claire, "ohmygod Carmen, you look like you walked out of the movie."

had dinner at the Tea Shake Hut or something and it was a superbly great talk with the girlies (:
Clarissa left for cheerleading at 7.
trimmed my eyebrows and the two very very tired girls left.
horrible time lugging the costumes and accessories back home and the auntie side of me was so rawly exposed and revealed when 133 came, in order to vie for a seat with the other despicable and irritating adults.

aye.
darn excited about tmr.
can't wait can't wait!

---

what's with guys and their "nurse" fantasies???

Natty's costume party was brought up in a conversation with Dickson yesterday:

me: .......... my friend's having a costume birthday party, so i'm going to look for costumes with my friends tmr.

dickson: costume party? so what are you going to dress as?

me: i don't know, we'll have to see what we can find at the shop.

dickson: a nurse?

me: -.-

e.m.o. -[edited]

omfg.
i almost got knocked down by an effing suzuki today.
it was travelling at like 70km/h and above in my neighbourhood? WTH!

what happened:
i just alighted at my bus-stop and was crossing the bus lane onto the curb of the bus lane.
this effing suzuki roared from far and was about to enter the bus lane and when the driver saw me, he shook right-left-right-left, before deciding to go back right again and stop in front of the bus stop.
WTH LA!
i was so stunned by the driver's speed i just stood rooted there.
then after that, traumatized, i kinda obstructed the way of another car when crossing the road..
OMG.
my mind couldn't recover for like, 5minutes?
and when the driver's friends boarded the car, the guy was shouting,
"朋友! 你驾这么快做什么？" (means friend! you drive so fast for what?)

---

i'm supposed to be mugging for my French Test before i leave for school, but because of that bloody incident i decided to blog instead. BAH.
slept super early last night. i went to bed at 845pm and i think i fell asleep before Rhythm of Life aired.
i think it's because i got my period yesterday evening, and so tired became fatigue and i just collapsed.
forgot my phone today and braved the storm with daddy this morning, entering UCCD partially wet.
was trying very hard to listen to Dickson's contribution for our pair work during tutorial but all i hear is his voice and nothing made sense.
next was trying very hard to listen to other group's answers and teacher's explanation but i only caught a couple of key words here and there and scribbled them down hastily before i forget again.

no appetite for break.
i ended up sitting there staring at my MR project.
not exactly in the best of mood today.
i think this month i have more progesterone in my body than oestrogen, which explains why i'm so moody and emo today ):
thanks enna sherilyn for the hugs (:
and dickson for countering all the effects that the hugs did and amplifying the effects of the progesterones!

aye. i'd better start studying for French or i'll probably end up getting an MC and pon-ing it! BAH!
this is REALLY testing my self-discipline.

---

[edited]

OH MIENZZZ

today's French Test was the WORST one i've ever had.
and i suddenly miss Vivian ng very much.
because she drops us SUPER lots of hints before a test
(to the extent that she'll email us the content of the test, tell us what we would be tested for composition and oral test, so we can prepare beforehand, memorise and regurgitate.)
digression: high uncertainty avoidance

this time, we were all totally so ill-prepared, because the new teacher, Monsieur Fleur (i love his name mann) kept us in suspense totally.
all we know is that the scope is from lesson 9-12 and there'll be written and oral test.
oral test maybe in a form of dialogue or a conversation with him, which would be decided on that day (today) itself.
we didn't even get to know the FORMAT of the written test! (low uncertainty avoidance HAHA)
OMG. i totally flunked.
BAH.
good news? there's only MR left now.
and i'm meeting the girlies (Clarissa & Claire) for costume shopping on Friday!
wheeeee!

---

thanks BFF for listening to me crap all about my nonsense this afternoon!
i think that was better than chocolate therapy that both u and claire mentioned (:
[because i ate twix with TRIPLE CHOCOLATE and it didn't really help much either]


I CAN'T WAIT FOR HOLS TO COME!
je ne veux pas travailler!

no matter

i completely forgot i typed a post on the impression of each and everyone of my new classmates! (as a 1month of school commemoration. haha. oh wells. shall update when term ends, and make it a term 1 commemoration instead.)


finally!
last friday handed in my SSM CA1 report.
today, i...- had my SSM presentation:
well, miss lily didn't really commented much on our presentation (i did it with Badriyah. and due to time constraints, we were the last group so she didn't really comment much.)
for me, she said my presentation was friendly, warm and i smiled at the audience (clients/competitors). my presentation was well-paced, good flow with the powerpoint and i had eye-contact.
that's it. boo. it's so unfair because other groups had pretty LONG and LENGTHY feedbacks.
and even though i HATE to say this, (because miss lily herself also said that as professionals, there should be no gender favouritism) but somehow she gives me the feeling that she likes the male population more.


- submitted a 40page report for UCCD (understanding cross-cultural diversity, for claire and nat's sakes because they're dying to know what i've been so busy with!)
we couldn't staple it so we had to go bind it at the photocopy shop:

Kellin and Carmen's blood and sweat.

it looks THIS thick, yeah babe.

but THIS is like nothing, because Clinton Ong and Dickson Lai's report is a freaking 57 pages thick! (ok la. some of our articles were double-sided so my report should be approximately about 45pgs? but still, 57pages?! haha. ok la, i heard from Shi Ping that Clinton's report got play cheat abit!)
anyway, the actual report is only 8pages MAX. so the rest are just useless things like cover page, content page, references, and the thickest of all - APPENDICES.

HOWEVER, that doesn't eliminate the fact that Clinton Ong Han Lin is a closet mugger!
and Dickson Lai Jia Hao too!

EVIDENCE:Dickson Lai looking like a GEEKY NERD with the plastic NERD glasses he just bought from Far East yesterday..
this is then the REAL him ok! don't be conned by his non-chalant facade.

OMG.
DBA13 is full of closet muggers larh!
the biggest one being Clinton Ong! (no matter how much you hate it when i say it! admit it!)

anyway, what's left now would be French Test on Wednesday (Oral + Written)
and MR report due on Thursday, which we're meeting up tomorrow to try and complete..
PHEW. GO CARMEN!

---

long day. after completion of UCCD report, had lunch with Melissa & Kellin during a time at which we were supposed to be in MLT 10 listening to the droning voice of Mr. K, and his constant naggings.
headed to Queensway, Vis Holland Condo to see my bro's brand new pigsty for the first time!
(it's located next to Clementi Town Secondary, very near Commonwealth MRT)
i would say i like the renovations, but the place is a tad small for my liking.
and i feel so exposed in the house because every room i go, the windows are facing some tenants or the main road. and they're on level 3. so it's too exposed for my liking. ugh.
i LOVE the balcony.
i LOVE the amenities too, which is wayyy better than the old Leedon 2 Condo.
location wise... the new one is of closer distance to the bus stop than the old one, but the old one is so near to Holland V! and the old one is nearer to SP (6 bus stops) while this one is about 10 bus stops away, which explains why i was late for Dip. Plus for 10mins.

will upload pictures very very soon!


watched Healing Hands III, and some things that happened in the show triggered me to think...
and delve deeper into the meaning of life...
I recalled Sunday's breakfast with Claire and Nat.. Where all we talked about was Uni admissions, Course Options, NUS, NTU, SMU, hall lives, blahblahblahblahblah, and of course,
OUR FUTURE.
(thinking 4-5years back, what were our main concerns? stupid and moronic random CRUSHES. *rolls-eyes-instinctively*)

it's as though everyone has only ONE route to take.
study study study, go to Uni, take Business/Medicine/Law.
make or break. die.
and i was wondering, is that all to our lives?
just become an average SOMEBODY that is leading lives that almost EVERYBODY else is leading?


food for thought.
random emotions are running through my mind, but i can't quite put them to words.
sigh. i really wish i have a better command for English. and as I'm wishing for this, my proficiency for Chinese is deteriorating by the second every single day.
and i'm learning French now, HA!

ending off with a nice song i heard from Healing Hands III, which somehow just strummed my heart:

Doesn't Matter who you are with
Doesn't matter where you are going
Don't you know I'm still waiting here for you
And Pray for you

In the sunny days, Suns will light your day
In the windy days, Wind will lead your way
I have to say, you're my treasure moments
Never gonna walk away

In the rainy days, rains will share my tears
In the stormy days, storms will steal my pain
Just go your way and leave things all behind
Spread your wings and fly away

I'm pretending you are mine
I'm wishing you'll be mine
The moments we share never die
You've made a difference to my life

---

sunshine,
my only sunshine,
i hope i can make your grey skies blue,
and all troubles fade away.
no matter what, no matter when,
i'm always a phone call / sms away.
i can't tell you how much i love you,
i can't tell you how much i care.
i can't tell you how worried i am,
but in anycase, i want you to know i'm there for you.
always there for you.

bitchings; on the verbal war

first and foremost, i'd like to heave a super duper dramatic big SIGH of relief!
*PHEW!*
Diploma Plus's Psychology Debate for our team is finally O.V.E.R!
(good luck to the next 2 teams on nature vs nurture)
well, our motion was "Humans are naturally good", and my team was the proposition team.
overall, opposition team did better than us. ):
but it was not unexpected as the opponent team is really very strong, and all of them were very outspoken and eloquent.
and i've to admit, our team's morale went down one notch just from knowing they are our opponent.


normally, after some presentation or in-class assessment is over, i'd just go, PHEW! and then get over with it, because what's done is done, and no point crying over spilled milk.
but this particular instance, i just want to note down all the lessons i've learnt from this debate.
it's not the outcome that really mattered the most to me, but rather, the process.
i think it was negligence on our team's part to have let the opponent team intimidate us, just because they had a headstart on doing the research for the debate like, 1 week before us.
stupid Forgel was blabbing during French class to me that how difficult it was, and how much they had to do and I totally freaked. (and honestly, it actually dawned on me that moment, "oh ya! the psychology debate! cuz i totally forgot about it.) and when we actually met up on Friday (French is on Wednesday), it then dawned on us that the debate's next next Monday.
so i admit, it's our own negligence that we didn't prepare sufficiently, and allowed the opponent to intimidate us.
that's lesson #1

next i think for our group, would be coordinating.
i think we relied on Yan Ting too much for our group's coordination in terms of exchange of information etc. and till now i still don't understand why there's a break down of communication. i only realized today that i had completely NO IDEA what Yan Ting & Russell's arguments are about, because I've never ever read their part of the research. and in the end, because of this, their arguments kind of contradicted with some other parts of our arguments. i'm not trying to finger-point whose fault is it here, but i'm just trying to show that both parties are at fault because we shouldn't wait for others to send us the information, but also actively and initiatively and responsibly request for it too, should we not receive it. and in terms of the sender, i think it's always a good habit and the team-mate's responsibility to email everyone in the team what research you've done to:
#1 show you've done your part of the work
#2 prevent overlapping
#3 allow consistency in the team.
this is lesson #2.

whereas for lesson #3...
hmm, it's a little more complicated.
kind of like a personal evaluation for each and everyone.
for Shi Ping,
he's really very stubborn at times, and i would bicker everytime we meet up (or rather, we bicker EVERYDAY since we're like classmates, but recently i bicker more with Clinton. haha. ) and sometimes he thinks in this really eccentric perspective that it will take some time to digest and understand what point he was trying to make. ok sometimes i don't even understand after long time of trying to digest. maybe he's too smart for me to understand? HAHA. (i think some times he's quite pessimistic too, ok digression.)
but nevertheless, i think he contributed the most (content-wise) to our group's debate for the point he found was the most substantial and useful.

for Yan Ling,
i was a little bit upset during the 15mins free-debate because i didn't get the chance to speak up much except addressing the opposition's queries on my points.
and during the free debate, after mentioning a point, Yan Ling went on to point out a second point, and i was quite shock because there isn't much left to rebutt from what we've gathered in the short discussion time we were given.
in my heart i was thinking, "Come on la, if you haven't realized, Yan Ting and I haven't really spoken in the free debate. Why are you so selfish?"

knowing Yan Ling, i know what she did might have been unintentional, but i think what Miss Tan mentioned is true. the opposition team's cooperation is really much better than ours, because like when Chin Xiang and Forgel are "over-talking", the rest of their team mates would gently remind them. and they have the conciousness to help each and everyone to speak up during the free debate, unlike our team.

for Yan Ting,
also a very hardworking member, and somehow, along the way she became the "coordinator" but it's just weird because all the information will go to her, but then not disseminated out, so there was the (mentioned) miscommunication and inconsistency of our debate.

for Russell,
always seem so heck care and look so blur in my opinion, but i'm surprised at his ability to think on his feet rather quickly. but i was feeling quite irritated on Saturday because he said he is free for the whole day when we met up on someday (thurs? fri?) to decide on the next day to meet up. and when we met up on saturday, he said he has to leave at 2pm.

as for myself,
i think i really really need to wake my brain up and make use of it more. i've no idea why, but my brain seems to halt and cease working whenever we're doing discussions. and psychologists have this tendency to phrase things in bombastic manner with complicated phrasing that just automatically switch my brain off. i need to activate my brain and be more quick in thinking off my feet, and also, be more analytical. that's where i'm seriously lack in.
besides that i think it all leads back to the same old problems of procrastination, time management. and when the going gets tough, the tough can't go shopping or viwawa-ing! (escapism) i just have this tendency to want to escape when the workload increases tumultuously. so i think to a certain extent, i didn't display the normal attitude that i usually have for projects in this particular one. (but you know what, i borrowed like, 8 books for the project?! spanning from NLB to SB lib to troubling Joel to borrow from NUS Central Lib and i have to go all the way to NUS to return the books leh!)

but all in all, i think i gained better insights of many things in terms of psychology related topics, and it also helped me re-cap my biology (serotonin, point mutation, photocopy error of DNA, testosterone, cerebral cortex -.-). i also realized the passion for biology is still there, (though not as strong as for psychology) but the knowledge just can't encode into my long-term memory lah boo hoo ):


let's just hope all these lessons are not forgotten!
because it is another painful lesson.

---

on lighter note, it's only 20% lah. (still, can make or break my grades leh!)

and
and
and!
OH NATTY POOT i received the Invitation!
ahahaha.
i'm so psyched about it, it's going to be like, my sole source of support to pull me through these few hectic weeks!!! (i've like, a ton of projects in due soon)

i was so psyched amidst moaning and whining and groaning about the debate during our last minute preparation, that when i saw the Invitation, I couldn't contain myself but started punching the dial keys for Clairey Neo Poots and Clarissa the Bimbo, just to take my mind off for awhile and also because i was TRULY excited about it.

alright enough! i need to chiong my QA tutorial already, and somehow i feel as though i've been talking for over an hour - exhausted and thirsty.

stagnant

–adjective
1. not flowing or running, as water, air, etc.
2. stale or foul from standing, as a pool of water.
3. characterized by lack of development, advancement, or progressive movement: a stagnant economy.
4. inactive, sluggish, or dull.
Synonyms: dormant, lifeless, dead, inert, lazy.

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yes that's the state of my blog, sad to say.
LIFELESS.
and i'm either too busy or too lazy to blog anyway.

HAPPY MOTHERS' DAY!

too brain dead to blog anything constructive so yeap, this is the end of my most stupid and unneccessary blog entry!
tata!

boring recounts.

last thursday,
i spent an infuriating long amount of time waiting for bestie.
we agreed to meet at 10am at Dover. but when my GEMs class ended at 935am, and I called bestie to check if she's on her way, I just aroused her from her pweeencess sleep.
so i spent a total of THREE hours plus waiting for her!
(she was supposed to wake up at 8am to do her personal statement, which is required for Uni application, and since she "didn't hear" the alarm, she had to make up for lost time and so I had to suffer!)
roamed around Dover aimlessly talking on the phone with monk..
went to browse the Creative Exhibition (Convention Centre/Auditorium i forgot) which was really pretty intriguing and I did my best to really examine each and every work that i spend an hour plus there.
the rest of the time was spend roaming around Popular and FC5 trying very hard not to look like a loser with nowhere else to go. (the annoying thing is because it poured earlier, I couldn't sit on the benches and act cool & read something. I had to look like a loser and roamed around like a houseless ghost.)

couldn't bear the atrocious hunger pang (note: didn't eat since i woke up at about, 635 till 12!) so i headed down to Holland V's NYDC and ordered Mushroom Madness Baked Pasta while waiting for the ridiculously late BFF.
and she treated me Jedi Monster Mudpie as compensation (:

BUT! i was late for UCCD lecture so I skipped it. and accompanied her to do some photocopying and filing.
escorted her out before i went for my MR lecture. and tada! end of school.

Friday was welcomed with much anticipation because of Lollipop!
lessons were suddenly so much more bearable.
and everyone suddenly didn't look so fatigue already despite it's the last day of the week.
and the school was buzzing with excitement and a handful of students with clothings/make-up screaming "i'm going to Lollipop tonight"
headed to HeSheng's place for changing and make-up with Shunya.
cabbed down to MOS to meet Xuan, Drey & Dy.
but,
Lollipop was a rather big disappointment. (well, alright for me because i still got to dance later in the night after re-entry. but i pity the 16-17 year olds who were anticipating "clubbing" but they only had 30mins on the dance floor. and at 930 sharp, we were all cruelly chased out of MOS.)
sneaked back home at 3am smelling of tobacco *ugh*

Saturday and Sunday were spent working tirelessly at Vivocity.
I didn't like the new environment (first time working for Best Denki. new part-timers. the whole place just sucked. wasn't as lively and fun as working for Courts. although its reputation sucks, but the employees are so much more friendly and chatty. maybe because Best Denki has better reputation and better sales the employees have lesser time to socialise with us?)
Saturday was a torture. I couldn't concentrate because of the lack of sleep + new environment, new system. but i still managed to sell 2 sets.
Sunday was even more torturous because of the impending guilt and stress of the undone tutorials overweighing me and ambiguity of whether or not i can be released at 8pm, and the lack of social interaction was turning me into a monster that scares customer away.
2 of my customers were "snatched" by other part-timers.
but oh wells. i was too bumped to snatch them back anyway.
so the end result was only 1set.

Monday,
my voice and throat died on me in the morning,
I caught a cold afer FMA lecture, and ended up having a 38.3dgc fever.
went Bro's place to take some pills and a nap, before die die heading back school in a cab for Dip. Plus at 530.

Tuesday,
MC! spent the day rotting at home and resting. and eating PORRIDGE all day because that's the most soothing food for my throat embedded with knives.

Wednesday,
back to school. finally finally met up with monk after so long. lunched at Marche. headed back to SP for my love, french!

Labour day,
planned to go bro's place to visit Kynan. but because my mum didn't call ahead to tell them, they had plans to go Paragon for tea and some minor shopping to entertain Kynan. (he loves leaving the house)
so in the end, i went Paragon Crystal Jade in SHORTS, HOME TEE and ADIDAS FLIP FLOPS.
i was even more underdressed than the maid, for heaven's sake.
spend late evening till 10pm with Xiuyi at my place (:

TGIF.

---

i think my blog's getting boring. it's like turning into a recount of my daily life on a weekly basis.
because i'm now only free to blog weekly, and when i have the time to blog, i normally already clean-forgotten what i had in mind to blog about..
and because in a week there's so many things to recount, i can't possibly delve deep into each and every event.
bah humbug.
i shall come up with some juicy and interesting thing to blog about soon!