congés please hurry.

stresssss

forgot how i spent my saturday.
sunday began with a healthy 1.6km with daddy at Serangoon stadium.
breakfast and a little tour around "kek sng kio" (i forgot the eng name and too tired to go recall) flea market that is usually flooded with lotsa lao ah peks.
bought The Confessions of a Teenage Drama Queen DVD at 50cts! haha.
watched it. bathed. hair cut. lunch. Tang Xin Feng Bao 2 all the way!

monday, went AMK hub to meet Dickson hubby to lend him my MR notes.
sposed to eat subz but we ate pepper lunch instead.
detoured to Orchard on my way to brother's place.
Int'l Biz Park at 7 for Sony Product training..
it's been a long long time since i meet my Vaio family! ((:
haha. it's the gazillionth time i listened to the product training. boring, albeit there were new models to learn and understand.
915pm we adjourned to the meeting room for briefing and it was seriously hell.
left Lihui, Aihui & I totally demoralised and dread going to work on thursday.
compared to ppl going to be at level 4, we at level 3 have to report for work 1h15min earlier. and our basic is $10 lesser.
comm is quite miserable compared to the last pc show.

HORRIBLE HORRIBLE HORRIBLE.

i feel so so so cheated.
to think that i'm almost jeopardizing my MR exam for this roadshow. (because of the lucrative money that Virus promised!)
the exam's on Fri morning and I'm working on Thu!
i can foresee that i'll collapse anytime within this week because:

Thu - 845 report work. 11pm closing.
Fri - 9am MR exam. work.
Sat & Sun same. close later.
Mon - GYL camp briefing 9am-3pm. and if i have any thing i need to buy, i can only settle it this day.
Tues to Fri - GYL camp @ Bintan
i am seriously gg to collapse.

wish me luck!

congés! congés!

hello miss carmen wong you wasted today watching txfb2 and only studied so little.
please hurry go study stop procrastinating! and stop obsessing about holidays!

P.S. Gan Jia Jia called me yesterday.. lol. she was supposed to call a Carmen from her hall but she called me instead. "Are you calling the right Carmen?" i asked, after listening to all her gibberish. she went, "OHMYGOD. CARMEN WONG!" as though i committed some heinous crime. -.-
today, she called again and i was like, "You sure you calling the right one this time?" hahaha.
Christina called yesterday! to thank me for the postcard.
Xiu Yi called at night when I was on my way home from training and we talked nonsense till 2am.

so good to hear from my babes.

i'm one lucky girl.

P.P.S. i want my love life to be brighter, bolder and bettyer too! but i think imma keep the window empty for the moment. and the moment isn't going to end anytime soon.

viscus versus cerebrum

wow. another demoralising paper.
buang-ed my QA like an uncontrollable car crash.
tsk tsk tsk.
PANIC-ATTACK!

anyhow,
rushed off t meet my BFF and crashed her lecture.
met Rachel there too and we sat together.
i kept texting melissa i can't believe i actually crashed BFF's lecture cuz it's so boring i was like wasting my life away.
headed to Queenstown shopping centre & we shopped for FBTs like aunties buying fish from the market.
Ikea next, for meatballs and daim cake!
heavenly ((:

we walked around thereafter to exercise our bloated stomachs and sat on some random rattan chair to talk for a looooong time.
it was the most inappropriate place for a serious heart to heart talk.
and i think i would never ever go so far and so deep with anyone else.
THANK YOU BFF.
for without you and my guardian angel, i probably wouldn't be strong enough to get through everything.
desperate housewives season 2:
"the trick is to keep moving forward. to let go of the fear and the regret that slows us down and keep us from enjoying the journey that will be over too soon."

for you, for him, for me, for love, for friends, for life.
for everything worth cherishing.

---

la cervelle versus le cœur.
it bubbles and overflow.
starts in my toes make me crinkle my nose.
but i push it out of my mind,
far far away.
because i know it's not meant to be,
not meant to be.

oh yeah.

Check out what I found:

http://www.alivenotdead.com/DebbieWong
http://www.alivenotdead.com/denisekeller
http://www.alivenotdead.com/daniel
http://www.alivenotdead.com/fionaxie
http://www.alivenotdead.com/allanwu
http://www.alivenotdead.com/jetli
http://www.alivenotdead.com/lisas
http://www.alivenotdead.com/cherrieying
http://www.alivenotdead.com/mindeeong
http://www.alivenotdead.com/lindachung
http://www.alivenotdead.com/rozpho

to a certain someone,
BIG DEAL! so sue me.

eve in eden

the one true love she seeks...
the doomed reality she tries to escape...
no.
she will wait
for someone to love her.
for someone to kiss her.
in vain she waits...
the land and the roses disappear
all that is left is her and despair.

it's beautiful.
i'm happy, she said.

---

Melly and I are DOOMED for QA.

repeat: DOOMED.

FMA was a killa.

and i love you, bitch.

IMAGE HEAVY!

13th August 2008, Wednesday
had botak jones at Depot Road with daddy before heading down to Jiak Kim Street.
NUS Temasek Hall Pageant 2008 - Glamour Kills @ Zouk
met Chloe and we were ASTONISHED to see how many votes Claire had:
(and we met Jia Min, Shi Hui & Rebekah. equally astonished to find out Hui Qi and Hui Ping are in the Pageant too! hmm, naughty naughty Claire! didn't tell us!)

F3 - Hui Qi
F5 - Hui Ping
F6 - Claire, my darling
(JUST LOOK AT HER VOTES. haha. i met my friend from JC, Ley Ying, who's in the organising committee for this event and she said she casually asked if Claire's mum wanna buy some votes for Claire and she bout $100 worth of votes! *each vote is 20cts so that's 500 votes!* Jia Min Bekah & Shi Hui each forked out $10 for Huiqi & Huiping)

i left around here because i had to go home and study for Psychology test which was a super stressful task because, as my previous post mentioned, it's not confined within you and what you write on the paper.
on paper, it doesn't matter if you leave it blank or write crap because only you and the marker knows.
instead, you have to regurgitate whatever that managed to retain in your puny brain out to like, half the class and the teacher. so everyone would know how much you studied. or rather how photographic and how big is your brain.
SUPER STRESSED.
so credits to Chloe for the pictures! (i only just got back my camera from her today that's why i didnt blog it till now)

---

The pretty good and clear and unblur images
but the photographer has very LOUSY skills because...
carry on scrolling and you'd know what i mean.

i nearly wanted to die laughing when i saw this photo!

if you still haven't get what i meany about the photographer,

he is simply UNSKILLED.

the shots are so UNFLATTERING!
either the girls look like they ballooned, or they blinked, or they look like they have bucked teeth.

balloon
bucked teeth
blinked
everything-in-one

pretty pretty Hui Shuang and some bunch of people (i presume, her new classmates? or VJC-ians)

In honour to my beloved Claire,
the woman who took my first kiss away!

her HC cheerleaders.
my JC friend, Xiu Yun 2nd from the left.

pretty happy that i met up with Chloe (with her eggciting juicy story), NatNat & her Phantom - YS, Yingxiu, Yiwei, Rebekah, Shi Hui, Jia Min, Hui Shuang etc.

DUNMANIANS UNITE ((:

Ley Ying & Marlene from NYJC.

wow. great to see how everyone has changed. tsk tsk.

Clairey Neo Poots!

Congratulations on the Finals!
I'm so proud of you!

LOVE YOU BABY!

(feel free to grab all these photos haha.)

---

on a completely random note,

i really think my "cousin" (technically, it's godsister) and mindee ong look alike!

baby mickey & friends; pooh <3

[clinton to carmen (from clinton's blog)] oh sorry, my niece is not interested in your nephew. HAHAHA! =P

TELL ME, HOW CAN ANYONE, ANYONE AT ALL, BE UNINTERESTED IN THIS LITTLE BRAT???

it's lindsey's loss k. =P

---

SSM paper today!
whoots. i slept at 9pm the night before and woke up at 3am to study all the way!
melly is damn kpo! smsed me at 2plus near 3am:
"Bitch! Need t text you now b4 i forget haha. O is *, S is *, Y is * and L is *? HAHHA. Wake up wake up now t reply me! Lol!"
i was supposed to wake up at 230am but i kept snoozing and den melly's sms made me jolt awake. haha.
anyway! being a bitch i wanted to keep her in suspense so i didn't reply her immediately. HA! (she made one wrong guess anyway! tsk tsk.)

so i text her about 3 plus near 4 and she's still awake! OMG. nocturnal owl.
so anyway! sorry to disappoint everyone, especially dickson, the SSM paper was relatively easy. haha. except i was so nervous because quote Clinton, "Seetoh said 'you take the paper = distinction. you take the make-up = fail.'"
so i was worried sick and then i blanked out for about 1min when the paper started.
haha. i think it's because of what Seetoh said, i'm the ONLY ONE in the entire cohort to take the make-up. TSK! and i nearly got a heart-attack when miss lily lim wanted me to take the paper in her office since i'm the only one. but i managed to wriggle out of it and take the paper in a classroom in the end.


City Hall to return Clinton the FMA paper he lent me.
Bugis to rot alone while passing time.
(I CAN'T FIND THE CASE! BOO! i think i need to check PP's pop or Cine's more than words. and i randomly bought 4 files & a letter pad & a wrapping paper. i think i'm trying to find comfort in retail therapy LOL.)
Met Dickson for lunch at Marina Square. wah. buay tahan.
he and his skewed theories.
then Junliang joined us for 12 Lotus.
Damnnn draggy.

---

i hope i can find a way to heal.
i hope i can.
For one more day: "you can be a mama's [girl] or a daddy's [girl], but you can't be both. so you cling on to the one you think you might lose."
true?

cuz i'm supergirl; and i have you so i would make it through.
没痛，哪里有爱？
没爱，哪里有痛？

不吐不快

i am feeling so damn freaking bored from studying!
OMG.
obsessive compulsive disorder, major depressive disorder, schizophrenia, eating disorder, piaget's theory on cognitive development, kohlberg's theory on moral development, erikson's theory on psychosocial development.
OHMYGOD i think i'm going to faint.
who the hell can remember all of this mann, who the hell.

zzz.

---

psychology test is finally over!
i think i fared average i guess, i mean, short term memory! what else can i say it's such a short topic.
but i think this way of assessment really helps learning, seriously:
the class was given 14 questions for the final test about 1month in advance.
and we were tasked to each do the questions, send to the class rep and then study the compiled answers.
on the asssessment day, ms tan would then draw lots to assign the questioner and the answerer.
the answerer would then ballot for a question to answer out of the 14.
when stuck, the questioner is supposed to prompt the answerer and guide him/her.
70% of the marks will be given based on how well each individual answered and 30% on how well each individual prompted the answerer and how supportive.

super nervous. but i think this form of assessment is beneficial for long term learning ((:

anyway, 有些事情，我真的不吐不快。
that's why i'm supposed to be studying SSM now but here i am blogging away.
i've been biting my tongue all the way to refrain from making any comments because i know it would be deemed as i'm siding O.

got distracted cuz my mum and the maid had to do some cooking and i had to play with pretty pretty boy.

but then again, the way you and you phrased it is as though O is a complete freak whereas S is some nice person.
i was shocked that of all person, L said "O is a FREAK, S is still alright."

well, from my pov, it is the ultimate opposite.
at least O is frank with whatever O wants out of O's studies, and O admits that O is perfectionistic. O has never seen anyone else as a competition but O himself/herself. (trying to be ambiguous on O's gender.)
whereas for S, S sees everyone else as his/her (trying to be ambiguous about S's gender too) competition. bootlicks the teachers whenever S can. (very super obvious, even S's good friend, Y also admittedly say that S bootlicks and try to buy teachers' good books whenever S can.)
so why then, does everyone "dislike" O?
and says things like "O is a freak"?
just because O gets good grades in no matter what O does, be it projects or tests?
just because O excels in things that O do?
and of all people L because it's not like L's grades are poor exactly.
people have never seen the other side of O, like how much effort O puts in, in everything, never seen the depressed side of O when things screw up. (screw up but not to the extent of fail but just not up to O's expectations, but like i said, O already declared out loud O's a perfectionist. and O has very high over the top expectations on himself/herself.)
so what? is that illegal, to be a perfectionist? to have high expectations of oneself?

i don't think so.
as long as that person has the ability to reach that expected results, i don't see why not.
so Y said that it is unhealthy to be perfectionist and all, but yeah (all the psychology problems one might face if one is too perfectionistic), but i think if one strikes a balance to it, then what's the problem?
so to Y, one cannot be perfectionistic but one can bootlick and suck up to people, and look at everyone else as one's competitor, and that's fine? so-called healthy?
i mean, if that's what S chooses to do, it's alright, it's S's view on the way to survive in this society. so why can't being perfectionistic be O's view on the way to survive in this society too?
why must everyone attack O like nobody's business?
i find it very unfair to O, because people judge O only from one perspective.
and i also find it very unfair that i've heard so many blatant lies about O, while everyone only sees the "nice" side of S.
i mean i'm ok with S, we've been on pretty good talking terms and all before that and S was nice to me and all, but sometimes, certain things that S do i just disapprove and disagree.
but i still don't judge all of S from this one side and one perspective right?

i know i cannot stop all these tongue wagging but it just hit me when O has been nothing but nice, supportive, helpful and kind person to me. and to everyone else O's a freak or some i-dont-know-what.
so while you can argue that i don't know the other side of S well enough to make any judgement about S, you don't know the other side of O well enough to make any judgement about O too what.

and i know what THEIR problem is.
the privileges that ** teacher mentioned for the scholars.
get real. life isn't fair.
have you all seen the unfair treatment O got for a certain project presentation?
no.
so while some teachers choose to be subjective, there's nothing we can do about it what.
and if you feel unfair that scholars get privileges, den go sign up and be a scholar la!
i think they compensated the privileges with a lot of sacrifices they make, and the additional stress they face worrying about their grades and getting kicked out of the programme.

i know if Y knows about this entry, Y would say i overreacted, oversensitive and BLAH.
but WHATEVER.

PHEW
ok back to studying ssm!

the five people you meet in heaven by mitch albom

"all parents damage their children. it cannot be helped. youth, like pristine glass, absorbs the prings of its handlers. some parents smudge, others crack, a few shatter childhoods completely into jagged little pieces, beyond repair."

"holding anger is a poison. it eats you from inside. we think that hating is a weapon that attacks the person who harmed us. but hatred is a curved blade. and the harm we do, we do to ourselves."

i don't think i can ever let go of it.
can you, 7, can you?

sMELLY girls' night out

thursday! liberation! after my GEMs quiz and GEMs presentation, i was literally hopping when i was heading to my brother's place, in a sing-song mood.
i was singing I'm Feeling You (michelle branch featuring santana) out loud to the beats of my iTouch.

your smile makes my world go round (:

in the nick of time.

can't wait for the day.

---

baby baby, don't hide your smile,
you know you're happy with me.

every picture has a story,

have you told yours?

haunted house.


Town-ed with melly after MR tutorial.
came back to school for MR lecture (spoiler!)
Raffles City with clinton & melly. ate a j.co each AND OCK while clinton ate cream puff.
he headed home with a dozen while melly & i headed for peninsula plaza.
Pasta Mania at Funan.
Loof was fully reserved UGH.
Chijmes was packed & expensive.
Timbre was full too, boo.
headed to loser home club.
well, we had to find a place to settle down because we've been wandering around, sweaty, sticky, clammy and SMELLY! (practically toured around the entire city area already.. -.-)
and home club was the only place with vacancies..
had a vodkha & margarita.
Singapore ah Singapore, Where are you ah where are you?

sMELLY, i had a great great time yo ((:
we should do this more often yo!

ongton, stop cooping yourself up!
CHEER UP!!! i hope the 12 donuts made you feel better.

an apology isn't an apology until you know what you're apologizing for.
and until you mean it.

il est neuf heures moins le quart

Dip. Plus class photo (:
last lesson for Introduction to Psychology Module on Monday. 1 down, 4 more modules to gooooo..

and our class would be getting smaller with 3 people withdrawn/withdrawing.

---

FMA make-up test today was surprisingly ok! (but that doesn't mean i'd score well because i suddenly blanked out and forgot whether it's NPBT or NPAT for some formulas and i just stunned there.. there was a 5m give away question, 9m of theory. all in all i shd pass no problem? hahaha. )

it wasn't as tough as i expected because the teachers repeatedly told us the make-up is harder than the original test.

Melissa (from another class, shay's friend, not my bitch) made sense when she said that:
a. either they're giving separate papers for make-up and re-test, OR

b. the paper should be easier than the original one since so many people failed.

funnily, there were about 50odd people in the class, and out of which, about 30 are from K's class! wahahaha.

French is getting quite horrid.

Alastair and I spend 50% of the time scratching our heads, wondering what the hell is the teacher speaking (since last week).

and the test is next week. -.-

baby turned 7months yesterday.

and last sunday, my idiotic brother, didn't take good care of baby and he fell from the dresser, which is about 1m tall.

as it turned out,

my brother wanted to bring baby for a swim on Sun as the weather was very good.

while changing baby, he left baby on the dresser for awhile and went away. and tada!

baby fell onto the floor from the dresser.

DUMBASS brother. no-brainer. how can he leave baby unattended on the tall monstrous dresser when baby knows how to turn his body already?

baby was angry at brother for a day and did not call "papa".

brought baby to KK for x-ray and doc said everything's fine, no fracture except several "balukus" but baby has to go back for another check-up next week.

hasn't been a good week for me.

nevertheless,

thank you BFF! & bitch M for putting a smile on my face (:

YEAH. hopefully i'll be hitting the pool and getting some sun tmr!

after reading *******'s lj,

people can be sometimes be so insensitive and blame it on others being over-sensitive.

as i told HL, i was quite pissed at one point of time, especially with L and CH, but i didn't want to throw a fit, for fear that i would ruin the what superficial friendship there was.

yeah, whatever.

"i acknowledge and move on with my life".

i'll do that.

move on with my life, that is.

i'm feeling you, do you?

WHOO!
i buang-ed my QA test and RWPS presentation today. whoots.
FMA make-up test tmr plus french lesson.
GEMs presentation plus GEMs test on Thurs.
next week:
Tue - UCCD test
Wed - SSM test, French test
Thu - Dip Plus Test

subway and mummy returns 3 after school at PS, with bryan, dickson, jun liang, melissa nathanael, puiling and shi ping today.
SO-SO only lah the movie. last friday's money no enough was also mediocre. i hope 12 lotus don't disappoint me (:

on a completely random note, do yall feel like shitting after you eat subway?
like it contains too much fibre it just clears your metabolic wastes out like nobody's business?
haha. melly and i experience such sensations whenever we eat subway and yeahhh the feeling is growing stronger now. =P

---

take time to realize, and i realized today.
you were never who i thought you were.

5, i think i like my window the way it is. hahaha. and i'm going to like, leave it empty and probably close it! LOL.

and 7, i know you would feel me, you would.
the feeling of swallowing every thing down, and plasting a fake smile and laughing along as though nothing happened, but inside, bleeding love.


I'm holding on a rope
Got me 10 feet off the ground
I'm hearin' what you say but I just can't make a sound
You tell me that you need me then you go and cut me down
But wait
You tell me that you're sorry didn't think I'd turn around and say:

That it's too late to apologize
It's too late
I said it's too late to apologize
It's too late

I'd take another chance, take a fall, take a shot for you
I need you like a heart needs a beat, it's nothing new
Yeah, yea
I loved you with a fire red now it's turning blue
And you say
Sorry, like the angel heaven let me think was you
But I'm afraid

It's too late to apologize
It's too late
I said it's too late to apologize
It's too late

oh i did warn you, but you never listened.
don't always think that an apology is going to work.
because sometimes,
it's just too late.

they say you haven't been blogging

picturesque!



my dad tried to wake me up in the morning but by the time my brain awoken, he'd left for Serangoon Stadium without me already ):

dang wo cai! but it was damn nice what. the little kids were so cute. i couldn't resist it. and then i couldn't sleep until 2am. so how can i possibly wake up at 6?



went for our HortPark adventure at 1130 am after breakfast at Toa Payoh.

pretty pretty flowers that looks like they're cut out from papers

Pitcher plant
Venus Fly Trap
i think it's a Daisy?
the dream portrait that i want hanging on my bedroom's RED wall.

some random scenery.

we went to scale the longest bridge in Singapore.. haha but gave up after 0.5km because the sun was really scorching. (1230pm leh. serves you righttt)

---

in the evening, a little family gathering at my cousin's place for my aunt's birthday celebration.(right next to Great World City - Tiara.)

his 1.5million apartment and $800k renovation + furnishing were honestly a spectacular sight.
on the 31st storey, the view was simply astonishing. ((:

fresh sunflowers!


steamboat!

happy **th birthday! (you know they say a woman's age is the greatest secret of all)

my cousin's newly bought yellow porsche (:

been there, sat there. haha. I WANNA DRIVE IT LAHHH.
but i doubt my cousin would allow me to drive his baby (after i get my license.)

haha. aye, i shall go eat the j.co donuts from my cousin now!
while the whole world is searching high and low for me tsk tsk tsk.
alright alright! coming alreadyyyy.

FYI:
my cousin is a SGX trader (awarded best trader 1st place in 2002) earning 5digits a month,
and is currently ATTACHED. hahaha.